75 Parents Sharing Their Hilarious Mealtime Struggles With Kids

1) Well Done, Soldier

Sounds about right. Why kids try to threaten their parents we’ll never know. Perhaps there are some moms and dads who give in so easily, but not Tim here. Tim here is a champion.

2) Uber Touché

If you don’t want your kids to play with their food, then don’t get them food that looks like toys. There isn’t a kid out there who isn’t going to play with his shark gummies.

3) True Story

Unless the answer is pizza or chicken nuggets, whatever you are going to make is icky. But then again, don’t you actually feel the same way unless you are offered Taco Bell?

4) Spread the Germs

It’s not like anyone ever died from ingesting bird feces, right? Oops! Kids can spread germs faster than someone actually trying to spread germs. They are naturals.

5) See the World

Packing kids non kid-friendly food is a good way to have it return to you that afternoon. However, if you slice the apples and send caramel dip, then she’ll come back with sliced apples and no dip.

6) It’s All About Me

Kids are natural narcissists and that’s okay. It’s the ones who don’t grow out of it that we worry about. Kids asking for a snack while you’re having contractions or laying on the floor with a broken hip, that’s normal.

7) It is Possible

Whether it’s a single block of packing foam or a pack of goldfish snacks, your kid will find a way to make sure it touches every room in the entire house. So be on the lookout.

8) It Was Dark

So, this happens far too often after Halloween. Moms and dads get to craving something sweet after their tyrants have gone to bed. And what do you do if the only candy is in their room?

9) Had Me in the First Half

Poor kids try to express themselves in the strangest ways. This four-year-old wants to show his mom what he loves but also what he hates. So that’s what he’s going to do.

10) Don’t Do This

This is disgusting, it’s true. You probably haven’t done this, but you definitely have crossed the line as a parent. Things you promised you’d never do happen every single day.

11) It Won’t Work

Some kids really do try. Even if it is to hold the flatuence off until after dinner. But of course, it won’t work. Might as well smell your hand afterwards, you know he’s going to.

12) He Totally Did

Play along. George Washington died far younger than he should of just because he refused to eat his broccoli and only wanted chicken nuggets and ice cream. The poor president.

13) Brutally Honest

Around seven years of age, children develop a sarcastic sense of humor. At times, it can be annoying. But other times, it’s hilarious. Anyone fancy a bowl of Broccoli Punch soup?

14) She Has a Point

The only reason that moms even get Mother’s Day presents is because they are moms. So it is true that the kid deserves a little something to because it is they that make it all possible.

15) Fill ‘Er Up

Kids will put forks in the power sockets and crayons in the VCR. No cavity is safe as long as they are wandering the halls. But why waste good spaghetti?

16) It’s What’s Best

As much as most parents care about their kids’ health, they don’t care about their own. That’s why you hide and eat cheesecake but serve brussel sprouts for dinner.

17) Bon Appétit

If you want your kid to eat their food, let them make it any way they want. You can have rules they never know about, like removing everything unhealthy from the house. Or just let them eat candy corn pizza.

18) Quotes from a Legend

This is something we can all relate to. Eating broccoli? Your heart wants dessert. Eating dessert? Your heart will always want more. Do the little dance and enjoy.

19) Mom’s Food is the Best

The best way to get your kid to eat something is to pretend it is yours. It works every single time! Kids want to eat your food because they think you’ll give yourself something special.

20) Like the Olden Days

Kids lose things every single day. That’s why you don’t buy them expensive lunchboxes or other things for school. Why do you think so many kids go to school with paper bags?

21) She Didn’t Mean It

This isn’t a kid trying to make a dirty joke. This is a kid who either actually thought they made the meatballs out of bouncy balls or thought it would be funny if they did.

22) You Can’t Blame Her

This is common practice. Whether it’s a Snickers or McDonald’s chicken nuggets, there’s always going to be treats that you allow yourself to be yours and only yours.

23) Whatever Works

If it works then keep doing it. Cheese and ketchup makes everything taste good according to kids. It’s a great way to meet in the middle and give them a balanced meal.

24) Social Life

Life on social media is not like life in the real world. Most of the time, you look like the perfect little family. But in reality, there are mishaps, fights, and chaos.

25) Could Be Anything

Kids make messes. We don’t know how they do what they do but they are masters from birth. If adults could do this, then surely job oppurtunities would arise.

26) It Really Could

The truth is it could really have been anyone. Though the seven-year-old is suspicious, leave it to the four-year-old to clean up Mr. Anonymous’ messes with ease.

27) Triangles, I Say

Everyone knows that all kids want triangle sandwiches not squares. Squares are boring and not user-friendly like triangles are. Take this as a note and warning for next time.

28) It’s a Skill

How does one take one single graham cracker and spread it throughout the entire house? Kids could solve world hunger if only they used this power for good.

29) She Loves Peanuts

Kids are weird. Buy them a gazillion toys and they will still choose household objects or strange food to cuddle up with or play with. In this case, it’s cuddle nuts.

30) It’s Fun, Try It

Who hasn’t eaten Cheerios like they were little donuts as kids? That’s the whole reason they came out with that donut cereal that looks even more like mini-donuts.

31) Lots of Kids

Chances are, this food was from the dad rather than his two kids. But at least he has a nice excuse as to why he has hot sauce and beef juice all over his work clothes.

32) Get It Right

Why do kids change their favorite foods so often? Oh, they don’t, they would just rather you not make them that right now. Let’s stick with pop tarts this week.

33) Open a Store

This couldn’t be more true. Kids never keep both of their socks together and they never eat all of their food. So save time and trash the money instead. You’ll thank yourself later.

34) We Could Try It

At Thanksgiving, we eat sweet potatoes with marshmallows on them. So why not just put them on other foods too. Every vegetable, meat, and grain? Yeah, how about not.

35) Throw it in the Trash

Even when kids get older and start making their own food, there will be times when they make it, take a bite, and then throw it away. It’s a part of life so get used to it.

36) Let’s All Do This

If we could all just calm down and have a piece of cheese, it would fix almost all of our problems. Except of course those brought to light by the vegans. Better closet eat that cheese.

37) We Feel Ya

As a kid, if you finally get to order your own food then you bet you’re going to get it wrong. After all, it’s a big job and you don’t want to make anyone wait.

38) Maybe You’ll Like It

There’s nothing fun about being awaken by someone feeding you. Unless of course that food is cheesecake. But then again, those grimy hands better stay away from your cheesecake.

39) As Days Go By

If you are a morning person, then getting up with kids is no problem, they are so sweet, after all. But by the time supper rolls around, the rope is about to break.

40) They’d Like It

To be honest, though this is unsanitary, kids will actually love it. Pretending to be an animal is one of the best games, and one of the best ways to get your kid to do stuff.

41) No Difference At All

Kids are like animals in so many ways, it’s crazy. The ability to speak and opposable thumbs is the only thing seperating them. So they’re pretty much talking monkeys.

42) Critics Have Spoken

It’s hard cooking for ungrateful children. Which is every child ever to exist. It’s not their fault you made their favorite one time and now that’s what they expect every night.

43) Never Give Up

Kids are resilient and they never give up. If they ask one day and you say no, then they hear, “better ask tomorrow,” and you betcha that they will. Never stop asking.

44) Only Child Syndrome

If you have a sibling or more than one kid, then you totally get this. Siblings will fight for equality till their very last breath. It’s one of the ways people learn about the term.

45) She Tells No Lies

This kid is going places. The best way to combat the things you don’t want to happen is with the truth. Who doesn’t know the pain of not wanting to do something?

46) That’s Brutal

There’s honesty and then there’s brutal honesty. This kid probably wanted to hurt whoever made his dinner and he was successful. Again, going places but not for the right reasons.

47) Problem Solved

Is it really your responsibility to make your entire family dinner? Maybe, maybe not. But as long as you make sure there is cereal in the house then everything will be fine.

48) Drink Up

Why do kids insist on eating and drinking things they shouldn’t? There isn’t a kid who hasn’t drank their fair share of bathwater so don’t pretend that yours hasn’t.

49) Good One, Conan

This only works if they earned that ice cream with their own blood, sweat, and tears. Then you take half of it away and tell them that they owe it to you and you’ll help them with it.

50) It Gets Worse

Restuarants waits a lot of food. Tons of food, actually. But toddlers have them beat because somedays, they get through without eating one bite it seems.

51) No One Wants To Be Judged

Being criticized is no fun at all, and kids are the biggest critics. Everything you make will be too spicy, too green, or too ugly. So you better just give up now and make it anyway.

52) You Knew This, Mommy

Kids are little liars. They may not always mean to, but they sure do tell little tales whenever it suits them. Perhaps it’s a new preference and perhaps it’s a cool dream they had. Or didn’t have.

53) They All Do, You’re Not Special

Anyone can say their kids eat completely healthy. But chances are, they eat pizza crust and fruit snacks just like everyone else’s kids do. Not special at all.

54) Thanks, Miss Underwoord

Is there an extra two chicken nuggets and carrots with ranch? You better get on that because it’s just going to go to waste. That’s what parents do, they clean up after their kids.

55) Nothing Does

Negotiating with kids and getting them to do things they don’t want to do takes a lot of willpower and ingenuity. If that doesn’t qualify you for a job then nothing should.

56) And Then…

Whether he’s telling a story or eating each Frosted Flake on its own, your kid is going to take forever to eat. Breakfast is no exception, especially since there’s so much to say in the morning.

57) This is a Valid Argument

This makes too much sense to argue with. If you’ve already had the best of everything then why even try anything else? It’s like finding your favorite pizza and not ordering it again.

58) Just the Maple

Syrup is super good. With bacon to dip in it or all alone. If you’re three-years-old, you can down a bottle like an afternoon bottle of milk. Just dare her and she’ll make it happen.

59) Sounds Like a Plan

This is a great plan. Who needs the middle man when you can just waste money and make a mess yourself? Who needs toddlers when you are perfectly capable yourself?

60) Thanks, Kid

There’s nothing like a kid offering you a bite of food and feeling obligated to eat it. You don’t know where it’s been but it’s probably not somewhere that you want to know about.

61) Dangerous

If you don’t eat your dinner, then you don’t get dessert or a granola bar five minutes later. The trick is to keep their plate in the fridge so they have no excuse not to eat it.

62) Tasty Boogers

Can you really blame a kid for eating their boogers? They will do it and it’s up to you to stop them. It’s only natural. So, maybe try to find something that tastes like boogers for supper.

63) Hide in the Closet

As much as we love our kids, ther are times when we will all resort to hiding to get five minutes of peace and quiet. Of course, they will find you. They will always find you.

64) Spicy Fruit

Someone is definitely playing a trick on this family. Those Star Wars gummies have definitely changed since yesterday. These gummies are spicier than minty gum.

65) Who Needs Shoes?

If you try to pull one over on a kid, they will try their best to find you out. Their detective skills are on point and it’s insulting for you to try to trick them.

66) Mommy, Mommy, Mommy

This happens a lot. It’s not always with mommy, but it is more often than not. Daddy can’t do this, only you know how I like my peanut butter and jelly cut. Only you, Mommy.

67) They Tell the Truth

What’s great about kids is that they are never afraid to tell the truth no matter how much it hurts. So if you’re eating too much, then you better believe you’ll be told.

68) Now That’s Focus

Kids pick and choose when and what they are good at. Patience may not be a skill today because they don’t need it. But tomorrow could be a completely different day.

69) She’s So Sad

Again, kids are self-absorbed, that’s just the way it is. Until they finally learn how to fully empathize thanyou’re going to have to deal with nagging no matter how bad you feel.

70) Icky Food

Toddlers have seriously eating problems. Whatever will nourish their bodies is what they will fight. But double ploy toilet paper? Bring on the whole roll.

71) Finally Alone

One does not simply have a romantic dinner at home as parents. While you can pretend your kid isn’t there, they totally are. So rock scissors paper as to who has to wipe them.

72) That’s the Life

Now this is what a family should be. While most “arguments” should end in the toddler giving in, it’s okay to eat donuts in your underwear sometimes. Give everyone a break.

73) What a Fun Joke

Toddlers do not simply just eat the food you give them. If you expect them to then you are the fool, right? Have we said to try chicken nuggets yet? Maybe a pudding cup?

74) No One Really Does

Why would you go to work if all they give you is celery? Silly mommies and daddies really need to learn to negotiate better things. Perhaps money so they can buy better food.

75) The Happy Ending

As a young child that has just learned to walk, nodding is something that can cause balance problems. So try holding off on asking such children if they want the most glorious food humans were ever given.